Hayley's Blog

Sometimes The Best Way to Hold it Together is To Let Go.

10/3/2017


Hey Guys,

I put on the brakes for a few days last week and spent some time at my beach house with Wes. He wanted to work on the house (putting some A/C in - yeah those Santa Ana’s were a killer this summer), and I decided to tag along. I figured it was probably going to be the last trip to the beach this fall, and besides, it was nice to have some alone time with my hubby.

After a super busy summer, it felt good to decompress. I’ve gone through some major challenges with my business and it gave me time to process a situation I was struggling with. May I tell you about it?

So, there are often times in my organization that a team member hits a wall, and, well … there’s a ripple effect. A few months ago, that’s exactly what happened.

One of my team leaders decided to step away from the business. Not like that’s totally unusual. It can happen when someone’s life circumstances make it difficult to maintain their team.

In this case, it would have left a big gaping hole, so I made a decision to pick up the slack. Part of my choice was that I’d be helping one of my friends on the team hold things together for her organization as well.

Now I am already super busy and the last thing I needed was to add another responsibility to my plate. And on top of that, it was also costing me money out of pocket every month. But at the time I felt it was the right decision.

Well, I recently un-decided.

Sometimes the best way to hold things together is to let go. And so I did. There was a little tension between my friend and me and when I mentioned it, her response was harsh. She was pissed off and her response left me pissed off at first too.

But I decided to step back and observe. I asked myself what I was choosing to make this situation mean. Why was I upset?

I was upset because of the thoughts I was having.

So I shifted my perspective and re-defined what was going on.

Instead of deciding I was a bad person, or neglecting anyone in particular, I decided to choose to believe I have the right to make my own choices in how I run my business.  

And guess what? Sometimes those decisions actually mean I can do what’s best for ME! I don’t always have to be putting everyone else first. As soon as I had a new thought (which meant sense to me and in which I firmly believed), I felt better.

Have you ever stopped to think about why YOU are choosing to do or see things a certain way? When you face a situation that takes you by surprise, the tendency is to react, so you get a pass.

But after the initial reaction, you can think your way through to another perspective, rather than making the situation mean something about you or someone else.

It can be super stressful to hold onto negativity, and relationships can crumble when we do. But by thinking your way through an upset, you can find yourself on the other side feeling peaceful and at ease.

Is there a situation in your life you’d like to think yourself free of?        

XO,

Hayley



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