How To Stop Seeing “selling” As A Dirty Word And Feel Good About Your Work

Today we’re gonna talk about something that many biz owners struggle with.


And I’m gonna start by dropping this truth bomb on ya…

If you struggle to make sales, you have a mindset problem.

Here’s what I know.

Sooooooo many people out there have blocks about money.

And HUGE blocks about ASKING for money.

I can guarantee you that a lot of this stemmed from how you grew up…

But since this isn’t a therapy session, let’s focus on the here and now. LOL

Women in particular struggle with this.

And if you’re in an industry like…

  • Wellness.
  • Coaching.
  • Spirituality.
  • Personal development.
  • Or education… can be hard to feel empowered enough to ask for what you're worth.

Women in particular don’t charge what they’re worth because we’ve literally been trained since childhood not to be…

  • Pushy
  • Bossy
  • Demanding
  • Or direct.

So money -- in particular ASKING for money in the form of sales -- feels like ALL of those things.

Wrapped up in a nasty little bow that makes you uncomfortable AF.

And what do we do when we’re uncomfortable?

We stop.

We play small.

We avoid the discomfort.

And here’s the thing…


We’re complex creatures, aren’t we? LOL

So today we’re gonna flip the friggin’ script on how we view sales.

Because I reaaaaaallllllyyyy want you to have everything you want out of life.

Yes, get that Tiffany necklace you’ve always wanted.

Yes, spend the extra dollar for organic strawberries.

Yes, buy that private plane.

Ok, well maybe not all of us can achieve that one… although I DO have a friend who just did that.

I’ll save that story for another time… LOL

Point being… to have the kind of prosperity that literally gives you freedom of choice…

Money is part of the equation.

So before we get into how to resolve these mindset issues with money -- including sales -- I want you to be realllll honest with yourself when I ask you this question.

Whatever your immediate response is… that’s the truth, ok?

**Do you have blocks about money?**

Ok quick, what was your first thought? Or how did your body react?

A block about money could look like:

  • Being overly concerned about how much you have… or how much you DON’T have.
  • Spending a lot of your time chasing money… overworking… and collecting money. I know that sounds like a weird way to put it, but it’s kinda like seeing money as a game or an end goal.

Blocks about money could be:
  • Overspending… living for the now -- and beyond your means.
  • Feeling like you aren’t WORTHY of money. 
  • Or undercutting your rates just to get the job, project, whatever…
  • This is the financial version of imposter syndrome… “Who am I to ask for money for my work, knowledge, or experience?”

Long story short, money blocks show up in TONSSSSS of different ways.

So let’s talk about how to get a fresh perspective…

One that will allow you to FEEL GOOD about making money.

I’m going to refer to us as “soul-centered” entrepreneurs.

Meaning we come from a place of integrity and heart.
We aren’t out to screw someone else over in the pursuit of money.

But we have value to offer… and deep down, want to be compensated fairly for it.

AKA: We wish to serve from a soul-level… so everyone wins and is happy.

Got it?

Ok, with this in mind, let’s cover 3 mindset shifts that will improve your selling skills… and help you make more money in an authentic way that feels GOOD.

#1: Flip the script on how you define selling.

What if you chose to think about it as connecting? 

Connecting feels good, right?

I mean, you’re there to provide value.

To offer up something another person doesn’t have… but wants.

That’s literally what commerce is all about.

I feel like those of us in what I’ll call the “softer” industries… particularly when what you do is a service or isn’t a straight up commodity…

Well, we can reallys struggle with the idea of selling.

I’ll tell you a quick story.

I have a friend who worked at a very prominent mission-based company.

A lot of spiritual-type practices… alternative medicine… holistic wellness… things like that.

And the company continually struggled with revenue… because of mindset.

You see, about 85% of people who worked there were there for the mission.

They literally were afraid to ask for money -- even though they provided a HUGE benefit for people.

So they looked at their top salespeople -- and what their approach was.

And the #1 thing they saw was these people were adept at connecting with their customers… from a heart-centered place.

They truly believed in the mission… experienced the transformation themselves… 

And were able to relate to their customers in a way that showed them that the transformation they desired was attainable.

Because money is just an exchange of energy.

They were not afraid to ask for the sale… because they understood the actual value.

And… they were honest if they didn’t have what the customer actually needed.

That’s the difference...

If you’re passionate about what you do… and you truly LISTEN to the customer…

You don’t have to fight for the sale.

The sale comes because you connect. 

Because you CARE. 

And you have a way to help.

If you feel bad about selling… you’re focused on what you can GET…

Instead of what you can GIVE.

AKA value.

Put that on a post-if if you need to.

Switch your mind to come from a place of service… of connecting… of GIVING…

And you’ll see how much easier it is to get people to say YES to you.

Ok so let’s move into the second mindset trick to improve your relationship with money… and improve the way you sell.

#2 Put yourself in the shoes of your customer or client.

Imagine that a product you love and use was afraid to sell it.

If the iPhone stayed underground because Apple was like… “no one’s gonna want this anyway”? 

Or “well, there are other phones out there… how am I supposed to compete?”

When you don’t let people know what it is you have to offer…

How are they supposed to decide whether or not they want to be part of it?

In the majority of industries, you have what’s called a “unique value proposition.”

AKA a series of differentiators that make YOU and what YOU have to give special.

I mean, even commodities do this.

Gas for your car is pretty much the same, right?

And one airline takes you to the same place as another.

So what makes you choose one over the other?

Southwest is brilliant at putting themselves into their customer’s shoes.

They’re all about low cost… efficiency… and excellence.

People who value those things flock to Southwest.

If you valued luxury, you’d probably choose to fly first class on Virgin Atlantic…

Or have your friend lend you her private jet. LOL

So for your biz, you need to put yourself in the shoes of who you want to help the most…

And recognize that it’s all about value.

If someone sees the value you have to offer, in their minds they make a quick brain calculation…

And to be real with you… it’s actually an EMOTIONAL calculation.

Here are 4 important words…

How. Can. I. Help?

Think emotionally… not tactically.

Once you can answer this question for your customer or clients…

And be able to communicate it well…

From the heart…

And demonstrate that you CAN help… and WANT to help…

Getting the sale will not just be easier…

It will FEEL better too.

Ok so we’re already at the third mindset shift that will help you improve your relationship with selling for your biz…

And it’s (# 3) getting clear on the source of the block.

This one is a little woo-woo but understanding what is triggering the block is super helpful.

Once you know the source, you can create an action plan to change it.

One of the biggest blocks regarding money is scarcity.

Deep down, you hold a belief system that there is a finite amount of money to go around…

And you don’t have as much as you need to feel safe.

And safety is a HUGE driver for us as humans.

You’ve heard of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, right?

I’m sure you learned about it back in college or something, so I’ll give you a brief recap.

Imagine a pyramid.

And there are five tiers.

Well, the bottom tiers are the most important.

Because if those primary needs are not being met, you can’t reach the next one up.

The very bottom tier is Physiology needs.

Your basic requirements like food, water, shelter, clothing, etc…

The tier right above that is Safety.

Those are your security needs. 

That includes things like access to resources… unemployment…

Other basics that money can provide.

So when you’re stuck in a scarcity mindset… you’re literally telling yourself those two base needs are in danger.

Which kicks off… what?

You guessed it.


Now, this all goes back again to how you were raised.

I know people who grew up with great wealth… and STILL have a scarcity mindset.

Because that’s how their parents treated money.

Again, this isn’t meant to be a therapy session… but understanding WHY you have a block about money is super important.

Here’s an example of something you can do.

If you suffer from scarcity mentality, you can literally rewire your brain.

Affirmations are SUPER powerful for this sort of thing.

You take whatever your block is and write an affirmation that is the opposite.

Using a positive phrase -- in the present tense.

Here’s an example:

Instead of: “There is not enough money to go around…”

Your affirmation could be “Money flows effortlessly and abundantly to me.”

Or maybe it’s “I have everything I need” -- if you feel super triggered and unsafe, deep down.

And -- I did warn you this is a little woo woo LOL -- but there IS actual science behind this.

See, when you make statements like this… in the present tense… your brain reorganizes itself to see it as fact.

“I am blonde” is the same amount of truth as “I am enough” or “I have everything I need” to your brain.

It truly cannot tell the difference when you use directive language.

You’re issuing a command in the eyes of your brain.

Wait, that sounds weird… but you know what I mean. LOL

So if you start reacting in scarcity mode… 

Take a deep breath…

Do a little internal work with yourself…

And ask yourself where this feeling is coming from.

Then write down some affirmations and repeat them to yourself every day.

Put ‘em on a post-it… in your journal… in lipstick on your mirror… whatever you’ll see the affirmation on the regular.

And once you get out of that scarcity mindset… you’ll have a whole new approach to your biz.

For example, you’ll be ok turning down low-paying jobs… because you know you’re worth more… and something better is coming your way.

You’ll stop chasing leads that are never going to buy -- and you have the headspace to SEE that super clearly.

And you’ll start attracting the RIGHT opportunities… because you’ll differentiate them from the wrong ones.

See how this all works?

Now… I know this was A LOT to cover in one short podcast…

Which is why I wanna invite you to explore this more with me.

Over a longer period of time.

And from people who REALLY know their shit.

Next week I’m hosting a completely free 3-day event.

It’s the Uncap Your Income Summit…

From October 12th to the 14th…

The place to go to reserve your free ticket is:

It’s online, so you can attend wherever you are in the world…

And there are over 25 speakers coming to share their wisdom on things like…

  • How to sell with integrity -- AKA a way deeper dive into the sort of thing we covered in Point 1 today. The amazing Neal Tricarico will be joining us.
  • How to Scale Wealth While Having a Life - My good friend Tom Challan will be here to tell you all about it.
  • Self-Care Strategies To Avoid Burnout and Thrive! That’s with empowerment coach Erica Diamond.
  • And the awesome Branden Lark will walk you through ways to create consistent income without long work hours… so you can work less and spend more time with your fam.
  • Plus much more!

This year’s theme is “Make more money & create a lasting impact”.

In addition to business… personal development… and marketing tricks you’d expect with that theme…

We’re also gonna cover what you DO with all that prosperity once you get it.

Because money without meaning is just paper.

It’s what you DO with the freedom, flexibility, and abundance that really matters.

And we’re definitely covering all of that, too.

So definitely sign up.

Again, the link is and it’s free to sign up.

Get all the details on that website… and I’ll see ya there!

I can’t wait!

Have a great week!