Have you ever had something really terrible happen in your life?
Maybe something happens in your family… a loss… the end of a relationship… a falling out that literally rocks your world.
Or maybe it’s something in your work life.
Like you got fired… or laid off… or if you have your own biz – you aren’t seeing the results you want.
If that’s where you’re at right now… and you’re like “Man – things don’t feel so stable and secure anymore. I have no idea what’s gonna happen… or if I can afford my lifestyle the way costs keep going up…”
In
this podcast episode, I share why mindset matters and how it can set you up for long-term success.
Because there IS a mindset for success.
Whether success means financial, personal, or some other version to you.
We get to choose what success looks like.
What Does a Success Mindset Look Like?
The success mindset is actually a formula:
Persistence + grit + determination.
It’s flexible, resilient, and optimistic.
You get creative and look for solutions when you have a success mindset.
But let’s get real…
It really comes down to how you handle the negative ish life throws your way.
Here’s an example.
I’m friends with two sisters.
And the way they handle hardship is completely different.
The older one is resilient AF.
When shit goes down, she hits pause for a minute to process what happened… and then is like, OK – let’s get to work.
Whether that’s to fix the problem… or mourn the loss… or put on a brave face for her kids.
Yet her younger sister… well, she kinda melts down.
She copes by turning to reallllyyyyy unhealthy habits.
She acts out. Flies off the handle with her anger… or ghosts everyone and goes radio silent.
Now, I wanna acknowledge that everyone is different. We all handle shit in our own way.
But can you guess which of the sisters is more successful in life?
Which one is actually happier on the daily?
And which one has happier, emotionally resilient children?
It’s the older one.
Bet you could guess that.
We always have to deal with things outside of our control…
How you deal with uncertainty and changes comes down to mindset.
Which means you are in control of how you respond… which is what can make or break you in the success department.
Here are some hacks to help you cultivate a success mindset.
Success Mindset Hack #1: Make conscious decisions + actions.
You may have been born with a certain default setting.
You may be good at certain things… or have certain natural skills, talents, and drives you can lean on in your work…
But mindset is changeable.
And what I’m suggesting is developing a mindset of grit, determination, and resilience.
Become aware of your default state.
When something bad happens, what’s your natural instinct?
Do you slip into a pity party? Or do you take a beat and go “Huh, that sucked… what can I do to make this better?”
Many of us live in a reactive state vs a responsive state.
Reactive is unconscious. The temper tantrums. The bleeding of emotions all over everyone willy-nilly. It’s immediate and it’s powerful. Like a tsunami.
You can cause a lot of damage when you allow reactive energy to take over your life.
On the other hand, when you’re responsive, you use your brain. You look at the big picture. You DECIDE to weather the storm. And you actually think before you take action.
The most successful people (meaning ones who are happiest, most fulfilled, most giving and connected) use responsive leadership.
And yes, you can be a leader without being a CEO or serving in public office.
Successful people are conscious, responsive leaders – with steel in their spines and an attitude of resilience and persistence.
Success Mindset Hack #2: Choose to be solutions-oriented.
We have a choice literally every single day of how we respond to things. And I mean anything.
I learned early on in my career that you never say “I don’t know” to a question.
You say, “Let me find out for you.”
Throwing up your hands when you don’t have the answer is gonna keep you small. It’s gonna keep you locked into limitation.
“Let me find out for you” is solutions-oriented.
And what I’ve realized is that when you’re able to make life easier for others, you get rewarded for it.
I actually want you to pay attention to this in the real world.
Like, let’s say you go to a restaurant and you ask about something on the menu.
Like – “What kind of peppers are in the fajitas?”
And if your server says, “I’m not sure,” or “I actually don’t know” without proactively offering to find out for you…
Notice how you feel.
Believe me, it happens to me a lot.
As a vegan who has struggled with digestive issues her whole life, I literally have to ask these questions.
It’s the difference between being able to go on with my day – or being doubled over with belly pains.
Anyway, when this happens to me, I used to get irritated.
Because like I said, I learned early on that shifting into solutions mode is much more powerful: “I don’t have the answer but let me find out for you.”
So the giving up attitude of “I don’t know” without any sort of “let me find out for you” reaaaallllyyyy used to get under my skin.
Now my eyes are opened to the truth.
That it’s a mindset issue.
And while it’s not my job to coach them through this, I don’t get mad anymore.
I just notice and go, huh – limited mindset.
And I either politely ask them if they are open to finding out for me… or I choose something else.
It’s not worth my energy to get flared up about this anymore.
The only person I can change is myself…
When I adopted a “let me find out” attitude at my work, I got promotions.
I got raises. I got moved up the ladder faster than my colleagues who just sat there and did their jobs.
And to be real with you… some of them were actually BETTER at their jobs than I was.
But because I went out of my way to find solutions and get RESULTS, I made other people’s lives easier.
Success Mindset Hack #3: Apply the “One problem, multiple solutions” trick.
I have to admit… I kinda jacked this one from Tony Robbins.
It’s well-known within his organization that “You can’t have a problem without a solution.”
What this means is… it’s simply not acceptable at TR to raise a problem to leadership without having at least two solutions.
Why two? Because he demands his staff be solutions-oriented.
It’s super rare that there’s ONLY one solution to a problem. Usually there are multiple ones… some better than others.
This “one problem, multiple solutions” mindset is built into their company DNA because he teaches others about flexible thinking, adaptability, grit, and determination.
To push beyond your comfort zone and get out of your own way.
I love this concept. And now, as a coach, educator, and thought leader… I help people come up with solutions to their own problems.
My job isn’t to tell others what to do.
My job is to help them come up with their own solutions. And take action on them. And be there as an accountability partner.
We all tell ourselves limiting stories. Even McDreamy.
And if he thinks that, what hope is there for the rest of us?
I’m just kidding, obvi.
Anyway, for us, these limiting thoughts show up as:
- “I tried it once and it didn’t work, so I’m out.”
- “I HAVEN’T tried this before so I’m probably going to suck at it, so I’m not gonna bother.”
- “This is the way it’s always been done.”
- “Things are out of my control – so I’m not gonna do anything.” (This is a big one RN)
But is that going to get you where you want to go in life?
That hasn’t been my experience.
My experience has been when I pause, consider, and take action – results happen.
Why mindset matters.
You can literally have allllll the tactics and strategies in the world…
But if you don’t have a flexible, adaptable mindset – the kind of attitude that says “I may not know what to do but I’m gonna figure this out” – then it’s not going to matter.
The truth is, you’re fully capable.
I’m not saying you have to *do* it all by yourself – or do it all alone.
When you’re solutions-oriented, you open up NEW ways of accomplishing what you want.
Maybe you partner with someone. Maybe you hire help.
Maybe you delegate or get things off your plate so you DO have time to put your incredible brainpower to create plans of attack.
Here’s an example from my own biz.
I pump out a lot of content on the regular.
Not just because I enjoy it – but because I know it’s going to serve my biz for where I personally want to go.
But not every piece is a winner.
Not everything I do goes viral or resonates with my community.
And you know what?
That’s ok. It’s a learning experience.
Sometimes I have something to say and I feel compelled to say it. Even if right now, my community isn’t in a place to receive it.
Down the line they may be. And it will be there for them.
I pay attention to the numbers in my business – and curate content I think will help my community. Right where they are. Right now.
I’m not always on the money with it.
It’s ok – I don’t beat myself up about it.
I don’t let this stop me from connecting. I don’t shrink inwards, telling myself a story that no one wants to hear what I have to say.
The truth is – you don’t have to be for everyone.
You don’t have to hit the nail on the head every single day, with every single person.
You’re bound to have seasons in your life and your biz where you get to reassess what’s important to you.
Who you want to be. What you want your biz and your vision to be.
No one says you’re locked forever into the decisions you make today.
I mean, I gotta tell ya… one thing that people both love and hate about me (which honestly, I actually love about myself)...
…is that I’m not afraid to make decisions.
Sure, they may wind up becoming non-optimal decisions.
But because I carry a flexible, resilient mindset – I know I have the opportunity to make another decision later – and I do.
You decide your mindset every day.
You get to have this success mindset too.
It’s a decision. One you can make every day.
Be brave enough to make decisions – knowing you will likely have a chance to make another one later.
Don’t wait to take action.
There’s literally never going to be a perfect moment.
Your perfect moment is NOW.
So stay persistent in your goals. Stay consistent in making progress toward them.
I know we’re in an uncertain time right now.
None of us knows what the future holds…
But what I can tell you – with absolute certainty – is that you can always bet on yourself.
You have something to share with the world.
And whether you already have your own biz…
Or you have a hobby you love and are like, hmm I wonder if I could make a little extra money from this…
Or maybe you have a ton of past work and knowledge you’re not monetizing yet…
The possibilities of what you can do with your life are endless.
Because the fact is, you CAN take this knowledge and turn it into an offer you put online.
Even if you’re not techy. Or think you’re not creative.
Or maybe you’re like, UGH – I’m just so damn TIRED right now…
I wanna show you a new path – one that’s totally doable. And FUN.
That’s why I invited my good friend Amy Porterfield to come talk with you.
It’s gonna be super fun. Girls chatting about how to futureproof your life.
Create abundance in a time of scarcity.
And actually ENJOY the ride.
But there’s one requirement.
You bring your questions.
Because you’ll get to ask Amy and me alllll your burning questions LIVE – time permitting, of course.
We’ll even help you come up with YOUR ideal biz idea.
Or give you our personal recommendations on what your money-making online offer could look like.
It’s like your fav brunch crew but without having to put on real pants. LOL
This special virtual event takes place on Wednesday, August 24th from 12-1pm Pacific / 3-4pm Eastern
I’m really stoked for this convo.
See ya there!
XO,
Hayley